Wednesday, February 20, 2013

Nice Guy Myths Part II: (Dude, Seriously, It Might be You)

Myth #3: Falling in Love Often- Means the Same thing as Loving Deeply… Because I’m Such a Nice Guy

If you walk into each new dating situation believing you may have found the future mother (or father) of your children, then you probably don’t even notice the actual woman (or man) who is in front of you… who she is, what she likes, her quirks, or her passions.   

It is likely you are so focused on finding "A" woman to fit into your future that you wouldn’t know the right woman if she smacked you upside the head. 

If you find your heart is being broken every other week, then it is likely you are giving your heart away with waaaaaay too much ease, and possibly for no greater reason than “Ug... you woman (or man).  You complete me.”

You don’t meet a person once a month who is worthy of receiving your pin number or computer password, so why give over something as precious as your heart to every cute person who says yes within a couple weeks’ time?

If your love life looks like this, then being “too nice” is not your problem.
1 Day Later
5 Days Later
3.5 Days Later
The Next Day...
The Next, Next Day...
One Week Later


If this level of love desperation is occurring in your life, then it is likely that the woman (or man) in your life knows… and your presence smells like that of a wounded zebra slowly dangling behind the herd.  We can smell it, and our primal instincts are telling us to promptly look at that tree over there with that neat leaf that turned orange even though we are still a month away from Autumn and pretend we don't see you.
 We know the buzzards are circling, and we have no interest to be generic woman #22 who said yes. 
We want to be the woman you WANTED to say yes.

Oh yeah, and being nice is not synonymous with being a stalker.

In Conclusion:
This isn’t to say don’t take chances, don’t give your heart away, or that you should immediately harden your heart and make the *&%$#$#  EARN that  %$#$@!  It is saying to have some discernment.  Maybe discover if you actually like the person (you know, for WHO they are instead for simply being in front of you) before you start crossing over into the land of the L-word. 
And please... talk to the person before updating your Facebook status. 
You're Welcome.

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